Dear workers on the house next door: I am planning your murder

[amber]

What can drive Amber into a murderous rage? Hearing the loudest noise in the world 20 feet from her bed at 7:30 on Saturday morning. Yeah,

7:30!

it was worse because I had been up till 5, and didn't have to wake up until 8:30, if you see what I mean. And me having to get up at all is an anomoly. So, I rushed out to the roof in my jammies (my porch is adjacent to the studio-below-me's roof, which ends next to the house being worked on, which is about 20 feet away, I just have to hop over my porch rail) and yelled "don't you think it's a bit early for this noise?! It's seven f*cking thirty on Saturday morning!!" and I waved my hands to indicate the many people living nearby who also might be irritated. Then I noticed that he probably didn't speak english, but I think he got the gist, as the loudest noise in the world turned into the most annoying medium volume tapping in the world.
I was still pissed, he's lucky I had to get up and leave. On a usual saturday, that tapping wouldn't have cut it.
I'm going to by a hose today, with a good sprayer, and if I hear that **** tomorrow morning, or any weekend morning, I'm going to spray him.
You know what he was doing? He was chipping the outside of the house off! With some kind of sharp hammer thing!

Then, on my way walking back from BART after dropping my paper, I'm toodling along the sidewalk listening to my rendition of WH on my ishuffle, wearing my Stevie shirt, happy as a clam. I had just performed amazing feats of jumpage and sprintage to make my BART, both ways! On the way there, I had to sprint and swerve by some girls on my left, then quickly avoid an old lady on the right of the escalator, then jump the final four escastairs, then leap ballet style (think If Anyone Falls video) into BART. Then, on the way back, I sprinted down the length of the station, avoided people by jumping onto a bench (so.awesome.) and continued sprinting while missing this one lady by an inch, to leap into the BART car!
So I was stoked, that is a fun morning for me, almost as good as rock hopping. I mean, it should've been in a movie. Tell truth, it didn't have to be that spectacular, but I like to go the extra mile and add the amazing jumps and swerves for my viewers. Hey, if you've got it...

Anyway, this car starts to pull out of a driveway onto the sidewalk. There was a bush right there, so it's a bit blind for the driver. I stop to wait for him to pull out and go, there are no cars coming. He stops his car and opens his door. I push the button on my ishuffle to pause it just in time to hear him say testily "take off your ipod. Okay, I'll pull forward, so you can walk around." WTF?! So I'm like "you can just pull out, it will be just as fast, I don't mind waiting."
So.Lame. As he was pulling out, of course I semi yelled "and don't tell me take of my ipod, a**hole!"

Okay, that was fun. I don't have a boyfriend, so there's no one to listen to my bitching, is why I wrote it here....

Edit - workers on house still loud, but now they've added hispanic music. Hurray! Thank god I have this beer. I think I'll blast Wild Heart at them. After all, they are 10 feet from my window.

Edit - my bedroom heater hasn't worked for months and months, and suddenly it came on. Only I just moved my bedroom to my frontroom and vice versa, so it's really now my "office" heater. Weird.