Gay Ledgies of the World Unite! - Page 23

sparky · #**331** 10-15-2004, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by strandinthewind

I have often said such terms are derogatory. Interestingly, the same could be said for the term "redneck" - I mean that term is rarely used in a non-perjorative context and usually with contempt a la fag and the N word

Hmmm....I grew up in total redneck country. I think redneck has actually changed too. They seem to have taken it back, ala the N word and a lot of the other charged terms in our lexicon. I rarely hear the word uttered with contempt. It is more like a common noun. So much of the change in tone with these words indicates the intent of the speaker - it is not always wise to simply react to the use of the word. You can call my pickup truck redneck, and I guess it kind of is, but if you sneer at it and spit out, "What a redneck heap that truck is", I may be inspired to give you a swift kick in the ass !

strandinthewind · #**332** 10-15-2004, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Violet

Actually, I have a brother and a couple brothers-in-law who fondly refer to themselves and their friends as rednecks. And they all are, too; hunting, flannel-wearing, live-in-the-boonies rednecks.

Carol
(Who, unlike her brother, prefers city/suburban life, and the only flannel I wear would be pjs, occasionally)

true - but black people refer to each other as the N word - but does that make it okay for a caucasian to do so as well and in the same manner and intent

DrummerDeanna · #**333** 10-15-2004, 12:35 PM

I actually don't think it's okay for anyone (even black folks) to use the "n-word" why why why would they adopt this term and use it? I agree with Cos in what he says about the use of the "n-word". I don't go around to my hispanic friends, "Hey Wetback!" or "Heya spic!" it's degrading...

In the same token I also don't see at as "okay" that people use the word fag....as Diamondsnake's original post stated...I've always percieved it as it's okay for people who are gay to use these terms (a similar situation to who can use the "n-word") like Like Dyke used to be a bad thing - now it seems to be accepted....

Umm...yeah..that's my take

Violet · #**334** 10-15-2004, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by strandinthewind

true - but black people refer to each other as the N word - but does that make it okay for a caucasian to do so as well and in the same manner and intent

Oh, I totally agree with everything y'all have said on that subject. Just wanted to throw in there that "redneck" maybe is a little different....maybe it's not. I also don't think redneck is as derogatory as the N word.

I'm not gay (though I have read with interest a good bit of this thread), so I can't really comment on "fag" and "dyke". All I can say is one of my best friends (I've known her since we were 3, grew up across the street from each other, and we went to see the Mac together last May

) is gay, and that's the only word I ever hear her use. Once when she was describing a girlfriend to me, she used the word Lipstick Lesbian. But that's it. She only uses "gay." Maybe she's different when she's around only gay friends, but I'd like to think she's not.

Carol

Sugar · #**335** 10-15-2004, 02:56 PM

I don't use any of those words ever. I think they are all bad words, bad in the sense that they serve no purpose other that to demean someone else. They're just too much trouble.

My sister was dating a black guy (Polo) and her best friend is a gay man who is in a committed relatinship with "Shane". Well one day Shane was pissed that Polo was being a jerk and consequently called him a "nigger". Shane felt he was justified because Polo had called him "faggot" numerous times before. Now my sister would say all the "faggot" comments were good-natured and that Polo didn't mean anything by it, but Shane wasn't convinced. Needless to say it's all a big mess now.

Now I think Polo has problems with gays and I think Shane has problems with blacks, but if no one ever used either of those words, whether they thought they were being funny or otherwise, it wouldn't be the mess it is.

You just never know what the other guy is thinking...

amber · #**336** 10-15-2004, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sugar

You just never know what the other guy is thinking...

Very true. I've learned that a couple times now...
AMber

The Tower · #**337** 10-15-2004, 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sugar

Now I think Polo has problems with gays and I think Shane has problems with blacks, but if no one ever used either of those words, whether they thought they were being funny or otherwise, it wouldn't be the mess it is.

You just never know what the other guy is thinking...

I don't think using those words pejoratively is a good thing, either. However, the smarter thing to do would to NOT be offended by the words. If you allow yourself to be offended by the taunt, then you're just giving the offender exactly what they wanted.

"You're calling me a faggot- so what? I'm gay and I don't care if you don't like it. By using that term you've just made yourself look like an idiot."

dissention · #**338** 10-16-2004, 08:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by strandinthewind

a lot

Surprise, surprise.

strandinthewind · #**339** 10-16-2004, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dissention

Surprise, surprise.

Well, it was a day that ended in "ay"

skcin · #**340** 10-26-2004, 12:23 PM

OT - wait, no, ON topic, lol.

Just bought my friend a magnet that says "if being gay is a disease, can I call in queer?"

Paula

Johnny Stew · #**341** 10-26-2004, 03:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by skcin

Just bought my friend a magnet that says "if being gay is a disease, can I call in queer?"

I love that!

For the past several years, I've sworn that I'm going to buy my friend Anne (yes, she would be considered my "fruit fly") the shirt that says, "I'm not gay, but my boyfriend is."
Of course, it's intended to be worn by a man, but it fits our situation perfectly, since everyone always assumes we're a couple. We're told that we're so cute together, and that our flirting is infectuous!