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  #31  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:35 PM
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Originally Posted by dissention
My friend Nick is as effeminate as they come. Queeny with a capital Q. I love him to death, but I can't say that I would find it attractive in a partner or a phuck buddy. It would drive me nuts and probably make me flaccid.


Well I guess I feel the same. I like a strong man.
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  #32  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:36 PM
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It's gotten to where the whole obssession with "straight-acting" that some gay men have is incredibly annoying to me. I have been attracted to men that might be considered "effeminate." Just be yourself. I have a friend (gay man) who thinks men dressing in drag is "not appropriate." His attitude strikes me as the same as the "straight-acting" thing...these people aren't comfortable with being gay, and it's kind of sad.
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  #33  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:42 PM
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Originally Posted by ryan8472


Well I guess I feel the same. I like a strong man.
It's the feminine voice and the drinking from a glass with a raised pinky and the overdramatics. Cumulatively, it's one giant turn-off to me, but if others like it, have some hot and dirty fun.
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  #34  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dissention
It's the feminine voice and the drinking from a glass with a raised pinky and the overdramatics. Cumulatively, it's one giant turn-off to me, but if others like it, have some hot and dirty fun.
Don't you mean mincing and dainty fun?
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  #35  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:46 PM
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Originally Posted by amber
Don't you mean mincing and dainty fun?


Yes, dainty fun. That is rich, good job.
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  #36  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:48 PM
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Originally Posted by dissention


Yes, dainty fun. That is rich, good job.
I suppose they could also have overdramatic and flouncy fun.
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  #37  
Old 10-30-2005, 07:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dissention
It's the feminine voice and the drinking from a glass with a raised pinky and the overdramatics. Cumulatively, it's one giant turn-off to me, but if others like it, have some hot and dirty fun.
I just kind of laugh at that kind of stuff. Its sooooo over the top.

My bf Brad and I are FAR from dainty. In fact, we're goofy and doofy; dumb and dumber
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  #38  
Old 10-30-2005, 08:00 PM
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Originally Posted by ryan8472
I just kind of laugh at that kind of stuff. Its sooooo over the top.

My bf Brad and I are FAR from dainty. In fact, we're goofy and doofy; dumb and dumber

DUDE ! You have a bf ? That is awesome !
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  #39  
Old 10-30-2005, 08:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by markolas
It's gotten to where the whole obssession with "straight-acting" that some gay men have is incredibly annoying to me. I have been attracted to men that might be considered "effeminate." Just be yourself. I have a friend (gay man) who thinks men dressing in drag is "not appropriate." His attitude strikes me as the same as the "straight-acting" thing...these people aren't comfortable with being gay, and it's kind of sad.
Straightacting is a misnomer. These guys aren't so straight with a di*k in their mouths. It is about being yourself and being relaxed. The men I find attractive are calm, confident, and grounded. And I like deep voices. Thus, I like masculinity. I think that a lot of gay men have issues with their fathers and reject everything their fathers represent, and sometimes that is why it is so easy for them to pick up all that over the top Paul Lynde Jack MacFarlane schtick. Which is not authentic to them either. I totally rejected my dad for awhile, and if I hadn't, when I was young I would have been a full on jock and probably joined the military. In my twenties I relaxed into the guy I am now. The queeny stuff is funny at a party, and fine with a friend, but a certain erection killer for me.

I used to hang a bit at a homo website called straightacting.com. It was pretty slow, but there were guys there who liked to talk about rock and roll, pickup trucks, outdoor stuff....I got a kick out of it. I took their test and got this funny little sig pic. I thought about putting it in my profile a long time ago.



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  #40  
Old 10-30-2005, 08:30 PM
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Originally Posted by sparky
Straightacting is a misnomer. These guys aren't so straight with a di*k in their mouths.
Well, I think so too, but I'm not the one who coined the term.

If "masculine" (whatever that means) is how you really are, then that's fine...what I find aggravating is when guys go overboard with the machismo because they're obviously uncomfortable with their homosexuality. Like guys who refuse to bottom, for instance.

I had a roommate who was gay, but didn't want anyone who was not gay to know about it. When I lived with him and we were interviewing potential third roommates, he asked me once if I would be willing to keep my being gay a secret. I told him no, and he actually wound up telling these people that he was bi, even though he'd never been with a woman. He would even try to talk about girls with some of these straight guys. And other things, like sports, which I knew he wasn't into, but he pretended to be so straight guys would think he was a "real man." Or something. It was sooo painful to watch.
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  #41  
Old 10-30-2005, 08:36 PM
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Originally Posted by markolas
Well, I think so too, but I'm not the one who coined the term.

If "masculine" (whatever that means) is how you really are, then that's fine...what I find aggravating is when guys go overboard with the machismo because they're obviously uncomfortable with their homosexuality. Like guys who refuse to bottom, for instance.

I had a roommate who was gay, but didn't want anyone who was not gay to know about it. When I lived with him and we were interviewing potential third roommates, he asked me once if I would be willing to keep my being gay a secret. I told him no, and he actually wound up telling these people that he was bi, even though he'd never been with a woman. He would even try to talk about girls with some of these straight guys. And other things, like sports, which I knew he wasn't into, but he pretended to be so straight guys would think he was a "real man." Or something. It was sooo painful to watch.
I had a gay friend who was so determined to hide his homosexuality that he hit on me whenever we were around other people. He went completely overboard with it, too. I expected someone to say "Thou doth protest too much." When he made some extremely inappropriate and bordering on degrading comment about my breasts in front of a teacher, I told him (when we were alone again) that I had no interest in helping him conceal his homosexuality. If he wanted to do it, that was fine, but he was not to bring me into it. He was so wrapped up in trying to hide it that he couldn't see that he was doing something unfair to me. This was a couple of years ago but I think he's still that way about being gay.
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  #42  
Old 10-30-2005, 08:41 PM
AliceLover AliceLover is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ryan8472
I just kind of laugh at that kind of stuff. Its sooooo over the top.

My bf Brad and I are FAR from dainty. In fact, we're goofy and doofy; dumb and dumber
When did YOU get a bf? And not tell me.
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  #43  
Old 10-30-2005, 09:36 PM
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Originally Posted by sparky
DUDE ! You have a bf ? That is awesome !
I know - our little Ledgie is all grown up - where did the time fly off to?

So, Ryan, spill - how long? Is it cool in your school or are you all not out? Not to sound patriarchal, but considering I am at at least 20 years older - it must be so much easier nowadays to be gay and your age. It certainly was not a few decades ago.
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  #44  
Old 10-30-2005, 09:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by markolas
It's gotten to where the whole obssession with "straight-acting" that some gay men have is incredibly annoying to me. I have been attracted to men that might be considered "effeminate." Just be yourself. I have a friend (gay man) who thinks men dressing in drag is "not appropriate." His attitude strikes me as the same as the "straight-acting" thing...these people aren't comfortable with being gay, and it's kind of sad.

You know, I see your point. The 'straight acting' thing can get annoying....but, really, it shouldn't be about the acting at all. I would venture to say that some of the femmy guys that we've been talking about are also 'acting' and not just being themselves....even so, I don't look down on the cross dressing guys - they are having fun, and that's no crime, but it's just not something that I'm interested in on a personal level.

While many gay men are pretty homophobic (it's true) there are some of us who are not, and our disinterest in effeminate men stems merely from that - disinterest. I'm not interested in dating a narcoleptic either, but it doesn't mean that I'm uncomfortable around them. I just want a boyfriend who can stay awake. And one who carries himself like a man instead of a high school girl from the Bronx.
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  #45  
Old 10-30-2005, 09:42 PM
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Originally Posted by strandinthewind
- it must be so much easier nowadays to be gay and your age. It certainly was not a few decades ago.
Gosh, tell me about it. If I had come out in high school (I graduated in 1991), I'd have been tied to a tree and beat. No fuc*ing joke.
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